Dr. Coach Love’s Red Flag
Checklist for Emotional Cheating
There are no tests for emotional cheating. The red flags below can be used as guidelines.
A build up of these behaviors with an opposite sex person can develop into marital neglect–at the very least.
____ 1. Secrets: Hiding evidence of contact with or
the identity of the other person?
____2. Confiding/Complaining: Violating partner confidence
by discussing or sharing marital problems/ issues
with this other party?
____ 3. Repetitive Contacts: Personally communicating
through phone calls, voicemail, e-mail, text messaging, etc. –
usually concealing contact from your partner or deleting records?
____ 4. Getting Together: Having a private get-together
for two or making sure to sit next to the person
at a group gathering?
____ 5. Private Disclosures: Revealing intimate life details,
feelings, hopes, and dreams–that even your partner does not know?
____ 6. Special Efforts: Taking a specific path to be sure to
“run into” him/her; dressing for the day with the thought
in mind of seeing him/her; or doing what is pleasing to him/her?
____ 7. Fantasy: Cherishing hopeful thoughts
about a future with this person?
____ 8. The Sense of Attraction/Tension:
You know what that is?!?
If you recognize any of these 8 signs in your behavior (or as a recipient), think about a serious self and relationship examination. Apply your relationship values and committments. You are probably risking your marital health or intimate committed relationship. Are you prepared to chance it?
MORE INFO: Posts- Pts1 to 5: 3-24-08, 3-25-08, 3-31-08,
4-02-08 and 4-05-08, 4-12-08
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