Dr. Coach Love’s Red Flags for Emotional Cheating

◘      Consider the following checklist.

◘       Apply your own values.

◘       Draw your own conclusions. 

  ___1. Secrets: Hiding evidence of contact with or the identity of the person.  

 ___ 2. Confiding/Complaining:Violating partner confidence by discussing or sharing marital problems/issues with this other party.  

 ___ 3. Repetitive Contacts: Personal relating through phone calls, voicemail, e-mail, text messaging, etc. (usually concealed from partner).  

  ___4. Getting Together: Having a private get-together for two or making sure to sit next to the person at a group gathering. 

 ___ 5. Private Disclosures: Revealing intimate life details, feelings, hopes, and dreams (that even your partner does not know). 

 ___ 6. Special Efforts: Taking a specific path to be sure to “run into” him/her; dressing for the day with the thought in mind of seeing him/her; paying thoughtful attention; offering special favors/ small gifts; or doing what is pleasingto him/her.  

 ___ 7. Fantasy:Cherishing hopeful thoughts about a future with this person.  

 ___ 8. The Sense of Attraction/Tension: You know

       what that is.    

• If you have checked any of the items above, make a careful examination of how this may be impacting or detracting from your marriage/committed relationship. Is this an emotional affair??                                   

                                 MORE INFO: Post 3-24-08