Fathers and Time with Kids: Weekday Fatigue 

I work 40+ hours per week and my wife works part time. Our three young kids keep us busy. Any weekday that we do not have lessons or sports activities scheduled, I am tired and like to veg out. The kids are still full of energy. They want to ride bikes, walk, play catch, or other high energy activities with me. I want to chill out on the couch with them. And, I have to admit, often I want to just disappear in my office alone and play on the computer. Suggestions, please?_____________________________________________________________________________________________________ 

With the hectic schedules of many families with young children, balancing casual family time with parents’ weekday fatigue can be a problem. Without changing job demands or cutting back on sports and other scheduled activities, you can learn to build slips of quality time with your children into the work week. 

When it comes to casual hanging out with your children, just because you want to chill and you are the dad, your choice should not rule— nor should theirs. Avoid displaying to your children what can appear to be a stubborn attitude “if we can’t play my way, I won’t play at all”. This challenge presents an excellent opportunity to teach your children collaboration and compromise.   

Here are seven parent coaching tips that may work for you and also teach valuable life lessons, depending on your children and their ages:

  1. coin toss: Winner chooses

  2. either/ or OPTION: Give them the choice of two activities both of which are acceptable to you. For example – ride bikes for 30 minutes or cuddle on the couch with their favorite book (or show) and chill for one hour.

  3. RAIN CHECKS: When you are simply too tapped out, give them a paper ‘rain check’ for time together with them. Put a  ‘redeemable- before’ date on it so you are not tempted to keep stalling and seem to break a promise to your children.

  4. playtime jar: Fill a jar with slips containing activities at different energy levels OR have both a high and low activity jar. You pick the jar from which they choose. Make sure to include their preferred activities in it—all with your OK.

  5. homework and play: Agree that when homework is done by a specified time, there will 15 minutes of play with Dad.

  6. Family play/game night: Establish a regular weekday time slot.

  7. family projects: Have an ongoing activity that can be done together in short blocks of time. Examples— working a puzzle, alternate reading a book chapter, or learning via watching a multipart educational series together, such as National Geographic. 

Be creative. You can design unlimited ways to casually plan weekday time with your children. Fathers are very important to their children in ways unique from mothers. 

What do you think? Work on developing your own options. 

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. 

Regards,

Dr. Coach Love

MORE INFO LINKS: http://familyandrelationshipcoachblog.com/2-find-it-fast/

v      I invite your comments below.

v      E-mail your relationship coaching questions to DrCoachLove@HireCoach.com.

v      Questions selected will be edited as needed to reflect privacy,

            brevity, clarity, and general interest.

v      Sorry, Dr. Coach Love is unable to offer any personal advice through this blog. This blog is not intended as a substitute for therapy. If you suspect any mental health problems, please seek immediate direct professional services as appropriate.

v      Check out relationship coaching services at www.HireCoach.com.

©       Copyright 2010 P.H. Pickett, Ph.D.  All rights reserved.

            Contact DrCoachLove@HireCoach.com for permissions.

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About drcoachlove

Dr. Coach Love is the author of the multiple award-winning book, The Marriage Whisperer: Tips to Improve Your Relationship Overnight, published by MSI Press, a traditional publisher in California. www.TheMarriageWhisperer.net

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